"She makes me tickle, even though she doesn't touch me."

-TJ Roth ( on the cuteness of baby Kirah )

"Someday you'll learn to listen."

-Eli Rieck ( to TJ Roth )

"What?"

-TJ Roth

"Eli, I need to pee really really bad!"

-TJ Roth

"Well, then wet your pants."

-Eli Rieck

"For reals?"

-TJ Roth ( eyebrows raised in shocked wonder )

"NO!"

-Nathan Goff and Eli Rieck ( simultaneously )

"Chop off my hand."

-TJ Roth

"I HATE baking soda."

-TJ Roth ( after being fed baking soda by Mike Sheppard )

"Somebody needs to give me a wedgie."

-TJ Roth