"That'd be the 'tard in me."

-Crystal Warren ( on making mistakes )

"You're so happy. Can I draw on you?"

-Crystal Warren ( to Scott )

"I almost just tried to take a drink out of my slinky."

-Crystal Warren

"Mmmm. Clogging arteries."

-Crystal Warren ( while eating an egg roll )

"I'm all about fake cheese."

-Crystal Warren

"Really."

-Scott Hamilton

"Not really. I just felt like saying that."

-Crystal Warren ( discussing Keebler products )

"I didn't think it would hurt so much to sneeze."

-Crystal Warren ( while working )