2015-08-27

"The things you learn when putting away leftovers while brushing your teeth."

-Chad Rieck ( Syrup + Wintergreen = Sassafrass! )

2010-12-28

"Stealing children is no way to get your jollies."

-Chad Rieck

2010-01-16

"Oooohhh . . . touch me!"

-Chad Rieck

2008-09-23

"Don't try to impress girls...you'll end up hurting yourself."

-Chad Rieck

2008-07-08

"*I* wipe on my pants."

-Chad Rieck ( giving a lesson in manners )

2008-07-07

"I just pray to God that I have to poop in the morning."

-Chad Rieck

2008-03-26

"Shut Up! I'm not the Mexican Consulate!"

-Chad Rieck

2008-02-15

"If you want some more syrup, there's some on the stove."

-Chad Rieck ( eating Johnny Cake )

"I think I'm fine, (said in a whisper) I'm diabetic."

-Anonymous ( Friend Jenna )

2007-12-24

"Dad, can I go to my room?"

-Chad Rieck ( exhibiting an odd sense of morality? possibly for the holidays )

2007-10-13

"Eli, when I become a billionaire, I'm gonna hire you to be awesome."

-Chad Rieck

2007-10-13

"I'm an adult, you guys."

-Danica Boe

"Some adults wear diapers."

-Chad Rieck

2007-10-12

"I didn't have poo in my tub. I had pee mixed with poo essence."

-Chad Rieck

2007-08-14

"It's pretty."

-Chad Rieck

"Yeah, they're like cow sprinkles."

-Anonymous ( Chad's friend, looking at finely chopped hamburger )

2007-08-12

"Ahh, the simple things in life... that make things more complicated."

-Chad Rieck ( after Eli told him of the cool 'thwopping' sound his new cell phone makes )

2007-07-02

"You think I have a tracking system in my underpants?"

-Chad Rieck ( after finding arabic handwriting on the cardboard thing in his underpants package )

2007-06-30

"This sock is amazing. I haven't had a sock this soft in a while."

-Chad Rieck

"I'm gonna go away now."

-Scott Hamilton

2007-06-18

"How freaking awesome is wearing your underwear on the outside?"

-Nathan Goff

"I prefer not to do it."

-Chad Rieck

2007-06-17

"Eli is Eli"

-Danica Boe

"Yes, and Nathan is Nathan"

-Eli Rieck

"And Chad is Chad!"

-Danica Boe

"Yes, and I don't like smelling feet!"

-Chad Rieck

2007-05-19

"So if She-Hulk asked you out on a date, you wouldn't go..."

-Evangeline Rand

"...I might have to."

-Chad Rieck

2007-05-19

"Scott, I'm sorry about that chicken."

-Chad Rieck ( regarding a drawing involving birth )

2007-04-29

"I smell a match."

-Chad Rieck

"Me too...We're all gonna DIE!"

-Allison Borngesser

2007-01-15

"Gosh, I love those Christian Lesbians."

-Chad Rieck ( voicing frustrations about Seattle spirituality )

2006-11-06

"It's no fair being the youngest. Everyone has more dirt on me than I do on them."

-Chad Rieck

2006-10-15

"If it was a bomb shelter, how would lightning burn it?"

-Cody Radle ( Chad's roomie )

"It's not lightning-proof, geez."

-Chad Rieck

2006-09-16

"It's like a scratch 'n' sniff that's soft."

-Chad Rieck ( on women )

2006-08-13

"You sound like a cow that's getting its kneecaps bitten by another cow."

-Chad Rieck

2006-06-23

"It'll be daytime in my pants."

-Chad Rieck

2006-05-05

"Eli, don't look stupid."

-Chad Rieck

2005-12-24

"So, do they just not know what a mystery snail is?"

-Chad Rieck

2005-10-22

"She could be a nanny for bachelors."

-Chad Rieck

2005-10-16

"You'd be a great paintball comedian."

-Chad Rieck

2005-10-16

"Nice karate chop action."

-Chad Rieck

"Somebody pushed my button."

-Eli Rieck

2005-10-16

"I'm an experienced breather."

-Chad Rieck

2005-06-19

"Hey Mom, have you ever been massaged with butter knives?"

-Chad Rieck

"I don't think I wanna try it."

-Glenda Rieck